I LIKE MY JOB...BUTT

Disclaimer: You'll probably have to tap into your six year-old self to be fully entertained by this post. ie: the days when the mere mention of butt, fart or burp would make you giggle uncontrollably while your mom rolled her eyes. So today, strive to ward off any motherly rolling of the eyes and instead embrace your inner child...

Adding BUTT to another word makes for hilarity. Kind of like adding "in bed" to fortune cookies or road signs - keeps ya busy for hours. (ok - maybe only on road trips or for the 10 minutes after you leave a chinese place, but still...you get the point)

For example...

BUTT MUNCH - a childhood insult that's sure to catch anyone above the age of six off guard. Seriously try it...it'll diffuse any argument, or at least bring about other similarly old school name-calling. Either way, should make for a good laugh when all is said and done.

BANANA BUTT - the official name for the pointy end of a banana that you come to at the end of consumption. To eat or not to eat? I say no to banana butt...yuck.

BUTT PASTE - Infant diaper rash cream, aka: my favorite baby product name of all time. They calls em like they sees em. haha

Butt...oops, I meant the other But -

But one I've recently discovered hits a nerve, and its no where near my funny bone.

CHAIR BUTT (bleh!)

When I hear this combo I shudder like the hyenas in Lion King at the mere mention of Mufasa. I say we outlaw this phrase from society like the forbidden utterance of 'he who shall not be named' at Hogwarts. Yes, Chair Butt is a dreaded problem the likes of which affects office workers and people who sit everywhere.

In case you're wondering if YOU might be suffering from chair butt - take a look at the warning signs:

You may be at risk for Chair Butt if you currently make the following lifestyle choices or if you experience any of the listed symptoms.

- Sitting for long periods of time.
- Lacking consistency in your work out regime.
- A butt that shows signs of resemblance to a chair that you sit in frequently.
- Sagging where the sun don't shine
- Jeans that don't fit cause you're butt won't quit (and you can't quit your day job to move around)
- People make a "beep beep beep" sound when you back up
- There's a little jiggle when you wiggle.

Testimonial: Sitting for 8 hours a day does a number on my attempts at keeping a shapely derriere. I mean, a girl can only do so many butt crunches until people start to look at you funny when passing by your desk. They seem to think you HAVE a problem instead of praising you for trying to AVOID a problem.
~ Kim from Louisiana

So if you're tired of CHAIR BUTT like Kim from Louisiana - you can help make strides toward the solution by participating with her in the Walk for a Chair Butt Cure. It will be held everyday from now until your butt no longer resembles a chair. The cost of entry for the walk is free, and all you have to be able to do it walk. (and do lunges and pilates and squats) A free T-shirt will be given to the first 20 people willing to pay $5.00 for it.

Remember - we all can do our part to make this world a Chair Butt free place - we just have stop sitting and start reshaping both our priorities and our patooties. Let's work to put all this BEHIND us shall we? Now let's kick our butts into gear and move!

Comment on this post if you'd like to sign up :) And remember - you're not alone in your efforts! Kim from Louisiana will be starting on her walk for a cure this afternoon at her apartment gym. Better still, She's currently offering an incentive for all of her blog followers who participate with her...

For every mile you walk, Kim will praise you personally on her blog! After each new mile addition she'll update the CHAIR BUTT BOARD (soon to be posted on Present Bliss).

Well, baby got back...er...I mean this baby's gotta get back to her work now. haha

DON'T FORGET TO COMMENT ON THIS POST IF YOU'RE UP FOR THE CHAIR BUTT CHALLENGE AND IF WANT YOUR NAME ON THE CHAIR BUTT BOARD TO TRACK YOUR WORKOUT PROGRESS!