HOW THE CINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS (and the rest of the holidays too)

Someone stole my holidays. I’m not sure who it was – but I’d really like them back.

My guess is that Santa and the Easter Bunny and all their holiday friends are being held hostage. Or maybe they’re off filming one of those Diet Dr. Pepper commercials. Or could it be that they’re just lazy? ‘Cause most of our holiday surprises show up a few days after the fact…if at all. And come to think of it, the surprises have a few more 75% off stickers attached than I remember from years past. Maybe our holiday mascots are a little strapped for cash like the rest of us…

Wait, are you shaking your head at me? And what’s that you say? I can’t blame my holiday heroes for celebrations we’ve missed at the Sigety home? You think it’s MY fault?? (Gasp!) But I LOVE Holidays?! I don’t get it. John and I haven’t opted to become Jehovah’s Witnesses, and we’re not allergic to holidays, and we like presents and parties and people. So how do our holidays keep coming and going without so much as an, “oh yeah – Happy….(fill in the blank)?

Sound the alarms! Call Nancy Drew! We’ve got a hum-dinger of a mystery on our hands people.

Hmmm…let’s look at the facts.

I’m pretty sure the only holiday we’ve celebrated since we got married was our first Valentaine’s Day (a whopping one month after we tied the knot. lol) And what romantic gift did I give John? A file cabinet. I know, steamy, huh? Cause nothing says throw me down and take me now like organizing important papers. (Should I admit that the organization freak in me actually finds that a little bit of a turn on?) Newlywed John reciprocated with a much more appropriate gift from Bath and Body Works. Or maybe it was a polite way of saying I stink. Either way – presents were given, happiness ensued, and we celebrated the occasion in the appropriate Valentines way…organizing papers…if you know what I mean ;) Which brought up the Sigety holiday celebration tally to a whopping ONE. Go us.

Then came Anniversaries, Birthdays, St. Patricks Days, you name it, but quickly they went with little more than acknowledgement. And Christmas…CHRISTMAS! Sure we celebrated with the in-laws, but we didn’t even get each other anything. Oops! I didn’t see that Ba-humbug coming!

So let’s do some reflection on all that.

John and I know we’re not OPPOSED to holidays, so could it be possible that somehow we simply miss them? I guess that’s probably the case. We hide behind excuses. Something comes up, or other plans go down, or our parties get pushed to the side, or heck, sometimes we even flat out forget. Yup, holidays at the Sigetys are like shooting stars. We try to catch a glimpse of them, but instead end up missing the fun while the world ooo’s and aahhh’s at the sight. The holidays fly by and we’re stuck the day after saying ‘Oooooo, Dang!’ and ‘Ahhhhh, not again!’

So we figured out the mystery! The holiday heroes are off the hook! It was the CINCH (aka: laziness) that stole our holidays!

Thus when Easter rolled around this year, I decided that things would be different. I was putting my foot down. The holiday CINCH wasn’t gonna make a clean getaway this time. So I headed to Walmart (cause that always turns out well here in New Orleans) with the goal of coming home with something more glorious than a file cabinet. Hooray! This Easter Bunny was on her way to put the hip back in our hop and the pip back in our peeps. Yes, this holiday really was gonna be different. But some might say a little too different than the rest of the world’s celebration...

You see, our wonderful bunny wanted to help the Sigetys in their weight management goals and thus opted to cut the calories…so no chocolate or candy. What?! Our furry friend also decided to make her recycle-minded hippie husband happy by saying ex-nay to the plastic grass-ay. And of course that meant a no go on the plastic eggs too. And then being the resourceful little bunny she is – our hare decided against paying for a flimsy neon basket and instead chose to reuse a plain basket from home. What an exciting Easter so far! Riiiiiight…..

And with that, our Easter Bunny hippity hopped home. She couldn’t wait for Sunday to deliver the goodies she’d gathered. No seriously, she couldn’t wait. So Friday night rolled around, and she placed a bag (not a basket) on the Sigetys’ bed. And what glorious surprises did she bring for John?! Why a memory foam pillow, new underwear, and beef jerky of course. ‘Cause nothing says Happy Easter like a good night’s sleep, undies with elastic that holds its shape and beef jerky breath. Ah, Springtime at the Sigetys.

So maybe we don’t celebrate in the traditional ways. Any maybe our breath smells more like beef jerky than jelly beans in the Springtime. But by golly – these are our holidays and we’ll celebrate how we like, when we like, and with whatever processed meat product we want! My only regret this year was that we didn’t have an Easter egg hunt to celebrate...Well, unless you count that John already found my egg a few months ago? I think that’s what’s called an ADULT egg hunt! haha And you’re right – that was inappropriate and doesn’t count. lol

All in all, I think it’s safe to say that while I’ve been pointing the finger of shame at all my holiday heroes for stealing my fun…the real Grinch to blame is me for falling victim to the CINCH of it all.

And even though it’s not always easy to celebrate holidays, those are the times that we look forward to and remember through the years. As non-traditional and weird as our family traditions may end up being, we need to keep those traditions alive.

So I suppose it’s time that I make my list and check it twice and realize that the “CINCH” is always gonna try and steal my Christmas and Eater and Birthday etc., but I can be the bigger bunny, er, I mean woman – and KEEP THE HOLIDAY SPIRIT ALIVE!

HAPPY (late) EASTER EVERYONE!